Sex, Here & Now
Psychology & Relationships
About
<span style="font-family:'-apple-system', BlinkMacSystemFont, 'Segoe UI', Roboto, Oxygen, Ubunt
Episodes
- Expert on Expert: Victoria Byler Helping Men Relearn Masculinity
I sat down with Victoria Byler, LPCC, owner of Revive Counseling, for a conversation that feels especially important right now. We dive into men, masculinity, and what it actually means to show up emotionally in a world that often teaches…
- Matt's Musings: Your Friends Don't Know What's Best For You
This episode questions relying on friends for sex and relationship advice, exploring how a sex-negative culture shapes the guidance given and received. It emphasizes seeking advice from informed sources rather than potentially biased persp…
- When Sex Feels Out of Control
This episode discusses the concept of sex addiction, noting it's not an official DSM-5 diagnosis. It examines what clinicians observe when individuals feel their sexual behavior is out of control, differentiating between behavior and funct…
- Listener Questions: Why Do Men Suck?
This episode addresses listener questions about starting a sex therapy practice, spreading sex positivity, and navigating cultural challenges related to sex and autonomy. It also discusses the messaging boys receive and its impact on men,…
- Matt's Musings: Just Get Pegged Already!
In this episode, Matt explores the topic of pegging, addressing curiosity, challenging ideas about masculinity, and encouraging honest sexual conversations with a partner. The discussion covers the origins of curiosity and its irrelevance…
- The One Activity All Couples Need To Do
This episode of Sex, Here & Now introduces the Yes, No, Maybe list, an exercise designed to help individuals and couples explore sexual interests, boundaries, and curiosities. The practice aims to build sexual self-awareness, reduce shame,…
- Expert on Expert: Julie Labanz Breaks Down The Harm of Purity Culture
On this episode of Sex, Here & Now , I sit down with my colleague and friend Julie Labanz for a conversation that feels both overdue and incredibly necessary. We dive into the lasting impact of purity culture and how so many of us are stil…
- Matt's Musings: Never Stop Dating Each Other
We talk a lot about how relationships change over time, and they do. Life gets busy, routines take over, and before you know it, you are not really dating anymore… you are just coexisting. In this episode of Matt’s Musings, I talk about wh…
- What To Do When Your Sex Life Falls Apart?
When sex starts to feel distant, tense, or nonexistent, it is easy to panic and assume something is broken. In this episode, Matt slows things down and walks you through what to actually look at when your sex life feels off. From stress, b…
- Matts Musings: You Probably Need Couples Counseling
There is this quiet belief that going to relationship counseling means something is wrong. That if you and your partner are “good,” you should be able to figure everything out on your own. In this episode of Matt’s Musings, I challenge tha…
- We Love Each Other, But We Don’t Have Sex.
Why do so many loving couples stop having sex? In today’s episode of Sex, Here & Now , I’m diving into something I see constantly in my therapy office: couples in their late 30s and 40s who are still deeply in love… but their sex life has…
- Matt's Musings: Making Sex Fun Again!
We need to talk about something that does not get said enough. Sex is supposed to be fun. In this episode of Matt’s Musings, I challenge the pressure people put on themselves to perform perfectly in the bedroom. From queefing to losing an…
- Expert on Expert: Kristen Lilla Spills on The Importance of Sex Education
On this episode, I sit down with Kristen Lilla, an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist and Educator, to talk about all things sex education and why the conversations we avoid are often the ones that matter most. We dive into her books, what ins…
- Matt's Musings: Bisexuality is on the Rise!
In this mini episode of Matt’s Musings , I’m diving into a topic that continues to spark curiosity, confusion, and meaningful cultural change: the rise in people identifying as bisexual. Recent research suggests that about 7 percent of peo…
- I Am Writing My Own Sex Vows for My Wedding and So Should You!
In this personal and reflective episode of Sex, Here & Now , I share something a little different. I am getting married this July to my partner of nine years, and as we started writing our own wedding vows, it got me thinking about somethi…
- Matt's Musings: Americans Want Open Relationships
A new study suggests that more than a quarter of Americans are interested in open relationships and honestly, my jaw hit the floor. Not because non monogamy is better than monogamy, but because it tells us something much bigger about where…
- I Feel Sexually Neglected By My Partner. Help!
What does it really mean when someone says, “I feel sexually neglected”? In this episode of Sex, Here & Now , I explore a topic that comes up often in my therapy office and in many long term relationships. Sexual neglect is rarely just abo…
- Matt's Musings: We Have to Talk about Soulmates
Welcome to my series of mini-episodes that I call Matt’s Musings. These episodes will be short, focused, and center on tips and tricks relating to human sexuality that I think are important for all of us to know and understand. And hey, yo…
- We Are Talking Squirting!
In this episode, I break down what squirting actually is, what it is not, and why so many people have been taught to misunderstand it. We talk about the biggest myths around squirting, including the belief that it equals orgasm or is the u…
- Matt's Musings: Sex Changes Over Time. Don't Freak Out!
Welcome to my series of mini-episodes that I call Matt’s Musings. These episodes will be short, focused, and center on tips and tricks relating to human sexuality that I think are important for all of us to know and understand. And hey, yo…
- Expert on Expert: Chatting with Tiffany Chin on Solo Poly and Dating
On this episode of Sex, Here & Now, I sit down with Tiffany Chin for a conversation that feels honest, thoughtful, and very needed right now. Tiffany is officially my first interview on Sex, Here & Now, and I could not have asked for a bet…
- Matt's Musings: Sex is Awkward
Welcome to my series of mini-episodes that I call Matt’s Musings. These episodes will be short, focused, and center on tips and tricks relating to human sexuality that I think are important for all of us to know and understand. And hey, yo…
- The Apps Aren’t the Enemy: Dating for You in 2026
Dating today can feel exhausting, confusing, and honestly… like you’re doing everything wrong. In this episode, I break down what it actually means to date for you instead of dating to be liked, chosen, or approved of. We talk about mindfu…
- Matt's Musings: Desire is Not a Personality Trait
Welcome to my series of mini-episodes that I call Matt’s Musings. These episodes will be short, focused, and center on tips and tricks relating to human sexuality that I think are important for all of us to know and understand. And hey, yo…
- My Journey Into Polyamory. Buckle Up!
Why would I choose polyamory when monogamy is the default, the norm, and often the expectation? In this episode of Sex, Here and Now , I share why I chose to be poly and what that choice actually came from. This is not an argument for poly…
- Bonus Episode! Valentine's Day Is Ruining Your Sex Life
Valentine’s Day is supposed to be about romance, connection, and great sex. So why does it leave so many people feeling pressured, disappointed, or disconnected? In this episode, I unpack why Valentine’s Day wrecks so many sex lives. From…
- Expert on Expert: Chatting with Julie Labanz on Porn, Masturbation, and Dating Younger!
Well, this is my first expert on expert podcast episode. Who's excited? Today, I am chatting with Julie Labanz , an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, owner of BeKnown Therapy in Cincinnati, Ohio, and a close personal friend. Julie and I talk…
- Matt's Musings: Stop Waiting to Feel Ready to Talk about Sex!
Welcome to my series of mini-episodes that I call Matt’s Musings. These episodes will be short, focused, and center on tips and tricks relating to human sexuality that I think are important for all of us to know and understand. And hey, yo…
- Why You Aren't Having Sex
In this episode, we get real about why so many people aren’t having sex and why that doesn’t mean anything is wrong with you or your relationship. I break down five common reasons intimacy fades, including lack of communication, avoiding v…
- The One About Heated Rivalry
We are back! We are motivated! We are talking about Heated Rivalry! In this episode: - I will talk about my obsession with Heated Rivalry. - Explore why representation matters for athletes and queer folx. - Explore the sex, duh! - Explain…
- You Don't Have to be Afraid of Polyamory
I wanted to talk a little bit about polyamory today specifically, why you don’t have to be afraid of it. We poly folx are not here to get you and turn your partners into poly monsters who crave multiple partners. Lol. Today I wanted to foc…
- The Garden Analogy
Emily Nagoski created an amazing analogy to describe how we learn our sexuality. Website and Socials below: Website: www.clevelandsextherapy.com Instagram: @clevelandsextherapy YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@clevelandsextherapy Patreon:…
- Quotes from Sex Therapists to Live By
Today I wanted to talk about some of my favorite quotes from prolific sex therapists, educators, and researchers. So let’s dive in! You are not promised time you are promised change - Emily Nagoski Emotional intimacy kills passion - Chris…
- We Are Back! Top 5 Tips for a Certified Sex Therapist
It is really exciting to be back and providing the sex positive content that we all need. I am going to be doing things a little bit differently this time. These first few episodes will be coming straight from my Patreon. They are early ac…
- Top 10 Myths about Sex!
And here we go again... I am so happy to be back and providing sex-positive content for all of you wonderful listeners. In this return episode, I thought I would demystify some popular myths regarding intimacy and sexuality. Enjoy! Don't f…
- Sex, Stress, and COVID-19
Hello Everything! I thought with all the talk of COVID-19, I would dedicate an episode to it! In this episode, I spend some time talking about what to do and not do when it comes to physical intimacy and sexuality, as well as general self-…
- Where in the World is Consensual Non-Monogamy (CNM)?
And we are back! This episode I talk about one of my favorite topics in the field of sex and relationship research, Consensual Non-Monogamy (CNM). I explore the use of terms like "traditional" and "non-traditional" when we describe relatio…
- Season 2 Coming in Hot!
Sex, Here & Now is back! This season you can expect more "sexy" information, new interviews, and as always, more sex positivity! Don't forget to follow me on Instagram @Sex_HereAndNowPod and look at my website, www.ClevelandSexTherapy.com…
- Baby It's Cold Outside!
Hello Everyone! With this being my last episode of the year, I thought I would touch upon some techniques you can incorporate with your partner to help heat up this winter season! As always, don't forget to follow me on Instagram @Sex_Here…
- Entering the World of Kink
Greetings Listeners! This episode, I decided to tackle one of my favorite topics of conversation: Kink Play! I provide an explanation of what a kink is (and isn't), how to support someone who has a kink, and also how to open up to your par…
- 'Sex,' The Supreme Court, and the LGBTQIA+ Community
This episode is all about the issues surrounding the court cases that were heard by The Supreme Court on Tuesday, 10/8/19. I talk about how (of course) it impacts the members of my community, the LGBTQIA+ community, but also heterosexual i…
- We Are All Sluts!
This week, I tackle our society's need to degrade other individuals, and also pinpoint specific words and phrases that I think need to be taken back from the world of sex-negativity. Also, I plan on doing a "Mailbag" episode and answering…
- Unwanted Arousal: "What's Turning Me On?!"
This week, I talk to you about the phenomenon known as Arousal Nonconcordance and the pioneer behind it. Also, a new mini-break about scheduling intimacy! WARNING: This episode does talk about rape and sexual assault. As always, don't forg…
- Know Thy Self (Love)
Masturbation gets a bad wrap. This week, I explore the history of physical self-stimulation, why people feel shame about this pleasurable behavior, and provide input on how to break the sex-negative cycle. Also, a new mini-education break…
- How Toxic Behavior is Destroying Gender Expression
This week, I dive into the (still relevant) topic of Toxic Masculinity and talk about its origins, what it looks like, and how our society can fight back against it. I also introduce a new segment specifically relating to Sex and Relations…
- The Myth of Sex Addiction
Sex Addiction is one of the most detrimental concepts that has infiltrated our society today. Join me as I introduce you to the term, its origins, and why it is important to stop using this term before it causes any more damage. As always,…
- Heterosexism vs Homophobia: What does it all mean?
Hello Everyone! Thanks for checking out the first episode of Sex, Here & Now! I wanted to note a few things for you, the listener: 1) Those are birds chirping in the background at the beginning of the recording. Still trying to work out so…
- Preview: Sex Here & Now
Preview of my new podcast, Sex, Here & Now