The Two Pints Podcast!
Comedy
About
For almost the whole decade of “the noughties”, Will Mellor and Ralf Little defined the voice of a generation in the hit BBC show Two Pints of Lager & a Packet of Crisps”A decade later the boys reunited and launched The Two Pints podcast in May 2020, which is now into its fifth series. Enjoying the kind of banter that only true friends can have, Will and Ralf chat sh*t to each other, to fellow celebs and to guests with fascinating stories to tell...all over two pints, (or sometimes a cup of tea). Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privac...
Episodes
- Flat Arse and Tiny Lips: A Swift Half
This episode of The Two Pints Podcast, "Flat Arse and Tiny Lips: A Swift Half," features discussions on listener questions, such as a "Would you Rather?" game, darts songs, and the topic of the perfect age. The hosts also promote their par…
- Prenups, Parking and Poo.
This episode covers topics such as celebrity prenups, parking problems, and unprofessional behavior. The hosts also discuss excessive force when pooing.
- On screen, dangling around: A Swift Half.
This episode of The Two Pints Podcast, titled "On screen, dangling around: A Swift Half," features a discussion on listener questions, full frontal nudity, intimacy coordinators, and stunt doubles. The hosts also promote their partnership…
- Back Home in the Pub.
Will and Ralf record from a pub, discussing topics like Ralf's play, pub facts, and life after 50. They also mention listener reactions and a sponsor, Greene King Pubs.
- A Massive Surprise for Will - Bonus Episode Part 3
This is part 3 of a bonus episode featuring Will's wife Michelle. They discuss topics including gifts, driving, snoring, and the secret to a happy marriage. The hosts announce a short break with a return planned soon.
- A Massive Surprise for Will - Bonus Episode Part 2
Will and his wife Michelle join Ralf to discuss their best qualities, who wears the trousers, who is the vainest, and their celebrity crushes. This is the second part of a bonus episode.
- A Massive Surprise for Will - Bonus Episode Part 1
This is Part 1 of a bonus episode of The Two Pints Podcast. Ralf has a surprise for Will. The hosts apologize for microphone quality in this episode.
- Sex Songs - A Swift Half
The Two Pints Podcast discusses listener questions on topics such as Welsh pronunciations and strange deliveries. They also debate the best songs for sex.
- Sporting Bloopers - 'What Will William Tell?'
This episode of The Two Pints Podcast!, titled 'Sporting Bloopers - 'What Will William Tell?'', focuses on sporting double entendres. It's a segment of the weekly 'What Will William Tell?' podcast.
- Does Size Matter?
In this episode, Ralf discusses topics such as vanity, women's perspectives, and personal worth. The host shares insights on these varied subjects.
- Fantasy Casting : A Swift Half.
This episode of The Two Pints Podcast, "Fantasy Casting: A Swift Half," addresses listener questions. Topics include fantasy podcast hosts, upcoming TV projects, and who would portray the hosts in movies.
- Monks and Mouthwash - 'What Will William Tell?'
This episode of The Two Pints Podcast! explores tales about Enlightenment, Devil Cats, and Roman uses for urine. It's titled 'Monks and Mouthwash - What Will William Tell?'.
- Foot Fetishes and Boring Sports
This episode of The Two Pints Podcast! covers a foot-based money making challenge and a discussion on boring sports, weird trends, and Only Fans.
- A Free Pass: A Swift Half
This episode of The Two Pints Podcast discusses hypothetical "free pass" scenarios, a supermodel encounter, and a comparison of sporting abilities. The hosts also share their contact information for listener questions.
- A Hotel on the Moon: What Will William Tell?
This episode of The Two Pints Podcast explores space tourism as William shares his findings and Ralf expresses his skepticism.
- Vabbing and Scrabbing.
This episode of The Two Pints Podcast discusses "natural perfumes," a visit to a high-end restaurant, and reflections on 2016. The hosts also mention other segments like WWWT and Swift Half.
- Advice for your Younger Self: A Swift Half
This episode of The Two Pints Podcast, "A Swift Half," addresses listener questions. Topics include advice for one's younger self and secret talents.
- The Worst Year to be Alive - What Will William Tell?
In this episode of The Two Pints Podcast, William investigates historical events to identify the worst year to be alive. He shares his findings based on his research through history books.
- Sliding Doors
This episode of The Two Pints Podcast! features a discussion on "Sliding Doors Moments," where the hosts explore instances when life could have gone in different directions. They also touch on topics such as talent shows, made-up stories,…
- Pet Peeves: A Swift Half
This episode of The Two Pints Podcast, titled "Pet Peeves: A Swift Half," features the hosts answering listener questions. A particular question leads to a response mentioning Pamela Anderson, Cindy Crawford, and Jenna Jameson.
- Face Farts - What Will William Tell?
This episode of The Two Pints Podcast, "Face Farts - What Will William Tell?", features William sharing weird and wonderful stories and facts found on the internet. The discussion includes a strange story centered around "Farts."
- Spies, Surprises and Sean Penn
This episode of The Two Pints Podcast! features discussions on various topics including spies, windmilling, breakdancing, xylophones, Valentines Day, and Sean Penn. The hosts also unearth a surprising event from 2004.
- I need your Prayers.
This episode of The Two Pints Podcast covers discussions on AI, phone usage, and a secret revealed by Ralf. Will records the episode while consuming an energy drink.
- What the Hell do those Notes mean??!!
In this episode, the hosts discuss their podcast preparation process and address how well the preparation was handled. They also confirm the return of 'What Will William Tell' and 'A Swift Half' in February.
- Windmilling at Wembley
Ralf and Will discuss their goals for 2026, including Will's ambitious wish list as he approaches his 50th birthday. The podcast also announces the return of regular segments in February.
- That was 2025!
The hosts look back at the highlights of 2025 as they begin their podcast schedule for January 2026. They also announce the return of regular segments in February.
- Midlife MOT - Numan Bonus Episode
Dr. Dave from Numan joins The Two Pints Podcast for a discussion on men's health. The episode covers topics including fatigue, diet, vitamin B12, BMI, belly fat, erectile dysfunction, prostate exams, and hair loss while emphasizing the imp…
- Invisible for the Day.
In this final 'Swift Half' episode of 2025, the hosts answer listener questions covering topics such as being invisible for a day, rejecting roles, and choosing a dog breed. The episode features sponsorship from Numan and Beerwulf.
- Will’s Christmas Crackers.
In this episode of The Two Pints Podcast, Will shares festive facts about Christmas traditions, including the history of the Christmas tree, historical bans on the holiday, and the origin of specific carols.
- I LOVE BEEEEEEEED!!!!!
In this episode of The Two Pints Podcast, the hosts discuss their favorite Christmas songs and films. They also chat about artificial intelligence, robots, Americanisms, and various other topics.
- Pints or Tugs?
This episode of The Two Pints Podcast covers topics including lookalikes, Strictly, and mistaken identity. The hosts also discuss whether listeners have had more pints or tugs.
- Sex, Surveys and Several Layers.
In this episode of The Two Pints Podcast, Ralf reacts to listener responses from the 'What Will William Tell' segment. The episode also includes sponsorships from Numan.com and Beerwulf.
- Are you a Psychopath?
In this episode, the hosts take a psychopathy test, discuss shaving, binge-watching television, hair loss, and the life of Charlie Sheen. The episode also features commercial messages for Numan and Beerwulf.
- I wasn’t expecting that.
In this episode of The Two Pints Podcast, the hosts answer listener questions in a conversation that takes an unexpected, genuine direction. The episode also features sponsorship messages from Numan and Beerwulf.
- The Dancing Plague
In this episode, the hosts discuss the historical phenomenon known as the Dancing Plague of 1518, which was featured in the "What Will William Tell" segment. The episode also includes information about the hosts' upcoming tour and mentions…
- Were the Moon Landings Faked?
In this episode of The Two Pints Podcast, the hosts discuss conspiracy theories regarding the moon landings with guest SciManDan. They aim to address claims that the Apollo 11 mission was faked and examine the evidence for Neil Armstrong's…
- Ghosts and UFOs.
In this episode, the hosts answer listener questions covering topics including UFOs, ghosts, losing their voice, and pressure. They also discuss their favorite episodes of the show.
- Weird Museums
In this episode of The Two Pints Podcast, Will explores various unusual museums from around the world. The episode also includes promotional information regarding Numan and Beerwulf, alongside details about the podcast's upcoming tour.
- Technology, Teeth and Taste Tests.
The hosts discuss technology challenges, dental issues, and participate in a snack taste test. The episode also features guest appearances and mentions upcoming tour information.
- Upstairs Today, Downstairs Tomorrow.
In this episode, the hosts answer listener questions, including a hypothetical scenario about changing sex, and discuss the 'Tea and Toast' debate. The episode also features details on upcoming tour dates and includes promotional segments…
- Sixth Sense or Coincidence?
Will and Ralf discuss the concepts of the sixth sense, deja vu, and premonitions, sharing their differing perspectives on the topics.
- Dancing on a Pub roof
In this episode of The Two Pints Podcast, the hosts discuss Will's past attempts to join a boy band, drunken auditions, DIY projects, and suspicious doctors. The episode also features information on upcoming tour dates and promotional offe…
- Our last day on Earth.
In this episode of The Two Pints Podcast, the hosts answer listener questions and discuss varied topics ranging from favorite crisp flavors to anatomical curiosities. The episode also includes sponsor information for Numan.com.
- Brains, Bangs and Jazz.
Will shares a story about the human mind in this episode of The Two Pints Podcast. The hosts also perform avant-garde music.
- Life in 200 Years Time.
The hosts discuss their predictions for life in 200 years and how future generations might view the 21st century. The conversation also touches on sex robots, mind-reading attempts, and a comparison between Ray Mears and Bear Grylls.
- Stand or Sit, Scrunch or Fold?
In this episode, Will discusses his toilet habits in detail, while Ralf shares a story about one of the saddest days of his life. The hosts also provide information regarding their upcoming tour and podcast schedule.
- Mr Mellor’s History Lesson.
In this episode of The Two Pints Podcast, host Will Mellor presents a history lesson featuring facts about Alexander the Great and details regarding the Battle of Waterloo.
- Little White Lies
Will shares a story from his school days about white lies, and the hosts answer 'would you rather' questions. The episode also features Dr. Dave from Numan.com discussing health issues and a listener Q&A session.
- Is that real or a prosthetic?
In this episode of The Two Pints Podcast, Will and Ralf discuss a TV show, manage life admin, and include promotional content. The episode also shares details about their upcoming tour.
- Vibrators, Love Chairs and The King of France.
In this episode, Will shares various facts ranging from chainsaws to the world's tallest couple, along with discussions on vibrators and love chairs. The episode includes information on the hosts' upcoming tour and a brand sponsorship.