Fragmented to Whole: Life Lessons from 12 Step Recovery
Psychology & Relationships
About
Tired of feeling fragmented and overwhelmed? Fragmented to Whole: Life Lessons from 12-Step Recovery is your guide to creating a life of wholeness, authenticity, and healthy boundaries. Join Barb Nangle, a boundaries coach and speaker, as she shares raw and honest insights from her own journey and the principles of 12-step recovery. Discover how to set boundaries without guilt or shame, overcome people-pleasing tendencies, manage your emotions effectively, cultivate a stronger sense of self, and build healthier relationships. Barb's approach is raw, honest, and sometimes a little bit (okay, a lot) sweary. Barb doesn't speak for or endorse any particular 12 step program of recovery. Though she's a huge fan of 12 step recovery, and a member of two 12 step fellowships, she cannot speak for them. If you're ready for real talk and practical tools for transformation, tune in! To learn more about Barb, go to https://higherpowercc.com/
Episodes
- Burnout, Compassion Fatigue, and Why Self-Care Is a Professional Responsibility | Episode 352
Send us Fan Mail In this week’s episode 352 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m talking about burnout, compassion fatigue, and the deeper reason so many people struggle to consistently care for themselves—even when they know how import…
- How to Stop Abandoning Yourself in the Name of Success and Goals | Episode 351
This episode of Fragmented to Whole discusses self-abandonment disguised as ambition. It explores the difference between self-care and neglecting present needs for future goals, highlighting how urgency and exhaustion can disconnect indivi…
- Letting Go and Letting God: The Long Walk from Pleasing Others to Purpose with Guest Art Blanchford | Episode 350
In episode 350 of Fragmented to Whole, Art Blanchford discusses his experience moving from workaholism and people-pleasing towards recovery, purpose, and spiritual alignment. He shares insights on the societal rewards of workaholism, the e…
- How to Overcome Guilt and Handle Pushback When Setting Boundaries | Episode 349
Episode 349 of Fragmented to Whole discusses the challenges of setting boundaries, focusing on managing the guilt and emotional discomfort that follow. It explains that guilt indicates breaking old patterns, not wrongdoing, and that anchor…
- How to Stop Tolerating What Drains You and Reclaim Your Time and Energy | Episode 348
Episode 348 of Fragmented to Whole discusses how tolerating small, unnoticed issues can drain your energy and time. It explains that resentment signals a need for boundaries and that stopping self-abandonment by setting boundaries allows y…
- How I Stopped Giving My Time Away and Took My Life Back | Episode 347
This episode of Fragmented to Whole explores the concept of boundaries concerning time management. The speaker discusses how a lack of boundaries, not poor time management, leads to one's time being constantly available to others, causing…
- How Time and Energy Boundaries Help You Start Where You Actually Are | Episode 346
Send us Fan Mail In this week's episode 346 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing a deeply personal experience that reshaped how I think about time and energy boundaries. After a period of illness, I noticed something unexpected:…
- How to Build Internal Boundaries So You Stop Fixing Everyone | Episode 345
Send us Fan Mail In this week's episode 345 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m bringing together the core ideas we’ve been exploring in this recent series on internal boundaries and explaining how they actually get built in real life.…
- How to Stop Your Inner Torment and the Urge to Fix Everyone | Episode 344
Send us Fan Mail In this week’s episode 344 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing how internal boundaries help you stop the exhausting cycle of emotional over-responsibility and the urge to fix everyone around you. This episode w…
- Other People’s Chaos Is Not Danger: How to Build Internal Boundaries | Episode 343
Send us Fan Mail In this week's episode 343 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I'm sharing a powerful shift that changes the way we relate to other people’s crises. When you grow up feeling responsible for everyone else’s emotions, someon…
- Why Adult Friendships Can Feel Like Middle School and What to Do About It | Episode 342
Send us Fan Mail In this week's episode 342 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I'm exploring why adult friendships can sometimes feel surprisingly similar to middle school dynamics. Many people stay in friendships where they feel like the…
- The Inner Safety Skill Building Method: How to Build Boundaries That Actually Hold | Episode 341
Send us Fan Mail In this week’s episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing the origin story of my Inner Safety Skill Building Method and why most boundary work fails without internal containment. I didn’t learn boundaries from…
- When Life Gets Lifey with Guest Spencer T | Episode 340
Send us Fan Mail In this week’s episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m joined by guest Spencer T, Al-Anon member and host of The Recovery Show , for a deeply grounding conversation about what it looks like to practice recovery whe…
- How to Build Emotional Boundaries That Keep You Whole | Episode 339
Send us Fan Mail In this week’s episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m exploring what it really means to be whole and how emotional boundaries are what make that wholeness possible. Inspired by the image of a plant that is always…
- Why Avoiding Discomfort Keeps You Stuck and How to Get Unstuck | Episode 338
Send us Fan Mail In this week’s episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m unpacking a topic that sits at the core of emotional healing and change: discomfort. Not all discomfort is the same, and confusing them is one of the main reas…
- How Internal Safety Changes Your Emotional World | Episode 337
Send us Fan Mail In this week’s episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m exploring what actually shifts when emotional safety stops coming from outside of you and starts being built internally. We talk about how our relationship wit…
- Learn to Tolerate Ease: How Compassion Softened What Pressure Never Could | Episode 336
Send us Fan Mail In this week’s episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing a deeply personal realization about how long I treated myself like a project instead of a person, and how learning to tolerate ease required far more c…
- The Art of Listening: How to Break Free from Chronic Conflict Loops | Episode 335
Send us Fan Mail In this week’s episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m talking about why so many couples get stuck having the same arguments over and over, and how real listening isn’t about communication techniques, but about the…
- How to Change Your Love Life by Becoming Emotionally Available | Episode 334
Send us Fan Mail In this week’s episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing a powerful realization from my own recovery journey: the pattern of emotionally unavailable partners wasn’t just about who I was choosing, it was about…
- How Boundaries Create Secure Attachment in Romantic Relationships | Episode 333
Send us Fan Mail In this week’s episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m exploring attachment from a different angle and sharing how boundaries and recovery can actually create secure attachment, even if you didn’t grow up with it.…
- Why Knowing Better Isn’t Enough and How to Train Your Nervous System Instead | Episode 332
Send us Fan Mail In this week’s episode 332 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m discussing something I often observe, especially during family gatherings: knowing your boundaries, understanding your patterns, and gaining valuable insig…
- The Hidden Rules You Learned Growing Up and How to Rewrite Them | Episode 331
Send us Fan Mail In this week's episode 331 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m talking about the invisible, unspoken rules you absorbed growing up — the ones you never agreed to, yet have been shaping your entire emotional life. I bre…
- Lost in Serenity with Guest Renee N. | Episode 330
Send us Fan Mail In this week’s episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m talking with my long-time recovery friend, Renee N., and her story is absolutely incredible. She grew up in chaos — emotional abuse, addiction, violence, and z…
- Healing Old Wounds: How Boundaries Helped Me Reconnect With Someone I Love | Episode 329
Send us Fan Mail Old family dynamics can feel impossible to change, especially when you’ve spent a lifetime carrying wounds that never had the chance to heal. For years, my relationship with someone I love was distant, tense, and full of u…
- How Manipulation Shows Up During the Holidays and How to Get Away from It | Episode 328
Send us Fan Mail Manipulation is often sneaky, sometimes unintentional, and rooted in fear (of abandonment, disapproval, rejection). For those in recovery, recognizing past manipulative habits—learned as dysfunctional ways to get needs met…
- Five Ways to Keep the Focus on You to Create Internal Safety | Episode 327
Send us Fan Mail The constant focus on things and people outside of your control is draining. I spent too many years of my life in this vicious cycle of external focus and validation, leaving me feeling like a fragmented, boundaryless vers…
- Letting Go Without Falling Apart: Real Stories of Boundaries and Self-Care | Episode 326
Send us Fan Mail Self-care is the very first personal boundary. It's the essential line between you and burnout, between you and your old perfectionism, and between you and the belief that your self-worth depends on what you produce. Many…
- From Flattened to Free-How to Escape the Bulldozer Cycle | Episode 325
Send us Fan Mail The bulldozer cycle, in relation to people pleasing, is the concept of feeling perpetually flattened by the demands and needs of others, trapped in a hidden cycle that leads to burnout and frustration. I’ll be the first to…
- Why Experience Matters More Than Credentials (And How to Own Yours) | Episode 324
Send us Fan Mail Too many of us get caught up in perfectionism, thinking that we have to meet every requirement before we're worthy and not to put ourselves out there until we're certain we won't fail. In my case, I was caught up in believ…
- How the Victim Role Hijacks Workplace Meetings (and What to Do Instead) | Episode 323
Send us Fan Mail Victim mentality shows up in all areas of our lives, but when it pops up in the workplace, it can derail an entire team of people and quietly take control over the workplace. Today, I want to peel back the curtain on how t…
- Back to School, Not Back to Chaos- 5 Scripts for Sanity This Fall | Episode 322
Send us Fan Mail The beginning of the school year is a difficult time for teachers and parents alike. Volunteer and extra curricular requests come in, calendars fill up, and before you know it, you’ve reached your capacity and your calenda…
- Why Boundaries are the Rules of the Road for Life with 10 Examples | Episode 321
Send us Fan Mail The reason we have rules of the road is because they're social boundaries. They exist to prevent harm, to reduce accidents and to create flow. When everyone keeps the focus on themselves, staying in their lane, following t…
- The Planets Aligned with Guest Kelly Walker | Episode 320
Send us Fan Mail Kelly Walker's story today is a powerful reminder that "the planets align" when we commit to our healing journey, even when it's terrifying.This week’s episode 320of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about when the planet…
- Why Mindset Matters More Than You Think: Boundaries, Recovery, and Belief | Episode 319
Send us Fan Mail What we believe is real becomes real in its consequences. And when our beliefs are negative, self-depricating, or otherwise limiting, they can create barriers in our lives. But when we rewire our brains and our beliefs shi…
- How to Go From Permeable to Protected- Building an Emotional Force Field | Episode 318
Send us Fan Mail One of the most common themes I see in my clients (and something I have experienced myself) is that we literally feel other people’s feelings. We’re permeable to them because we don’t have a boundary. This week’s episode 3…
- Why Controlling Everything Still Doesn't Make You Feel Better | Episode 317
Send us Fan Mail Many of us find ourselves in this delusional thinking that the outside world could give us satisfaction, if only things went our way. The truth? There is no external solution to internal pain, and it only brings you deeper…
- How to Backfill the Love You Didn't Get as a Child | Episode 316
Send us Fan Mail Recovery showed me that I abused and neglected myself physically, psychologically, emotionally, and spiritually. I stayed in relationships and workplaces that were toxic, and I put up with abuse from bosses, colleagues, sw…
- Keep the Focus on Yourself- The #1 Boundary Setting Rule | Episode 315
Send us Fan Mail People tend to hear the motto “keep the docus on yourself” and think it means “be selfish.” That could not be further from the truth. It’s actually about stopping your focus on what other people, places, and things are doi…
- How I'm Choosing Depth Over Hustle and What That Means for You | Episode 314
Send us Fan Mail When I started this podcast, I had no idea that it would turn into such a meaningful part of my work and my connection to you all. What started as a place for me to share my lessons and experiences through recovery turned…
- How to Go from Victim Mentality to Empowered Living - You Have Choices | Episode 313
Send us Fan Mail Before recovery, I had no idea how many areas of my life I didn’t even perceive as having a choice in. I thought, ‘This is just the way it is; this is just how life works.’ But one of the greatest freedoms recovery has giv…
- The Humbling Truth Behind My Need to Rescue and How I Got Out of It | Episode 312
Send us Fan Mail For much of my life, I've known that one of my most hated human characteristics is arrogance. So, imagine my surprise when I learned in recovery that I was arrogant. Recovery also helped me understand that I hated it becau…
- Choosing Peace Over Panic- Why I Stopped Watching the News | Episode 311
Send us Fan Mail When my homeless friend moved in with me, we often listened to music instead of NPR, which was typical for me at the time. I came to realize that replacing politics with music shifted my mood drastically. When I was no lon…
- It's Hard to Get Off the Ground When Your Wings Are Cut with Mark | Episode 310
Send us Fan Mail For some of us who struggle with addiction, we’re using our addiction to fill some type of hole we’re feeling. Today’s guest, Mark, was using his compulsive, addictive behaviors in an attempt to fill a “God-sized hole” in…
- How to Find Peace: Mastering Acceptance in Difficult Times [Replay] | Episode 309
Send us Fan Mail Before recovery, I had heard all about the importance of acceptance, but my question still remained: How do I do it? It wasn’t just one thing that helped me but a series of lessons that helped me change my thinking, reduce…
- How to Go Beyond 'Woe is Me'- Sylvia's Powerful Shift to Self-Ownership | Episode 308
Send us Fan Mail Regardless of how long I have been working with clients as a boundaries coach, I am still amazed by the mind-blowing revelations my clients have as a result of working with me. Today, I am sharing one of these profound exp…
- Compulsive Overeating Recovery- Discovering Unconditional Love After a Food Slip | Episode 307
Send us Fan Mail One of the most profound things I have worked on in my recovery journey is showing love to myself even after I make a mistake. So, when I had a recent experience where my unconditional love was tested after a slip-up with…
- How to Unpack Emotional Unavailability- My Journey to Feeling My Feelings (and Yours) | Episode 306
Send us Fan Mail For years, I thought emotional unavailability happened to me, not something I actively participated in. Spoiler alert: I was dead wrong. Today, I'm pulling back the curtain on my journey from emotional unavailability to em…
- From Reactor to Responder- How to Break Free from Old Patterns | Episode 305
Send us Fan Mail One of the promises of ACA (Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families) is that we go from being a reactor to an actor in our lives. This means taking a proactive approach to our lives rather than reacting to…
- How to Handle Life's Demands Without Losing Your Shit | Episode 304
Send us Fan Mail Changes in medicine, technology, currency, and so much more are happening at an exponential rate, and our ability to adapt is either going to make or break us. If you're able to adapt, you'll be able to thrive instead of j…
- When Love Means Letting Go- How to Break the Cycle of Codependency | Episode 303
Send us Fan Mail Codependency in relationships can be a complex cycle to break, especially when it comes to family members. We tend to tolerate toxic behaviors for the sake of love and loyalty. That’s why today I wanted to unpack some of t…